Alone

Inwardly you groan…moan and grunt. A thousand words all stuck and struggling for expression. Politically correct, socially acceptable… The more you try the less result you getYour intentions are goodBut it comes out all messed upYou open your mouth to screamBut you stop shortYou can’t spill itCuz you’re the preacher’s son Day and night you gruntThe feel of guilt weigh hardLike a burden on a beastSlowing down the progression to an endPull pull you think you moveBut on the same spot still remainA burden bearer I seek But all I see are tale bearerSeeking for the next juicy bitCuz he’s the preacher’s son Up to heaven his eyes are raisedBlurred vision tears have causedGroping and stumbling he wanders roundSeeking for a pleasure once feltShutting his eyes he seesVisions of years long goneYears of communion in the Father’s bosom Oh that a hand would reachOh that an ear would listenOh that a heart would understandAnd lead the preacher’s son to the Father’s love

Friday evening….

Been resuming by 6:30am and leaving the office at about 9pm for the past 2 weeks….but today…somewhere on the Lagos-Ibadan express way is the girl that stole my heart away…Been  listening to music and dancin on my seat…guess i would be outta here by 5pm…

It’s an evening all of Lagos has been looking forward to. It’s the Experience 2007…an gospel music concert organised by the House on the Rock (Pastor Paul Adefaransi). Tye Tribbett, Kurt Carr, Israel Houghton, Don Moen, Lionel Peterson, Cece Winans, Pastor Marvin Winans and the Hon. Bishop T. D Jakes…whoa…let me hear you SSSSSSSSSSSSSSCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM………………..

Okay she is just gone past the redemption camp, she should be….here any moment now…owww..i’m blushing****

Oh no! The parents are in.

When are you going to tell your parents?

I thought you didn’t want me to tell them.

But who would you tell them you are going to see everytime in Ibadan

My friend

I dont want any wa ha la, just tell them

I’ll tell them in 3 years time

Then don’t talk to me until three years time….

 ______________________________________________

Hi honey, just told my parents i asked you out. They want to know if i’d pop the big question.

OH MY GOD! SO WHAT WILL YOU TELL THEM! 

 Well i smartly avoided it by saying it’s stage by stage….

 _______________________________________________

Umm, today i finally got to tell my folk about cutie and the response

 WHERE IS SHE FROM?

WHAT OF OTHER GIRLS IN CHURCH?

WOULD HER HIGHLY SCHOOLED PARENTS ACCEPT YOU?

SHE IS NOT VERY TALL

WHICH CHURCH DO HER PARENTS ATTEND?

AS A FIRST SON YOU CHOICE IS KEY AS SHE’LL DECIDE IF THE FAMILY STAYS TOGETHER OR IF YOUR HEART GETS STOLEN AWAY….

I sat there answering on question after another and i was wondering…a really sweet, well bred young lady from a fine stock said yes to your son who owes where he is to God’s mercy and love and instead of being happy for me you are……

well well i guess i understand, even when my elder sister was getting married to the finest young gentlemam in the church i still felt like xraying his life to make sure he doesn’t tear us apart.

Dad, mum, love is all that matters…well and maybe family acceptance, money, religion, friends, beliefs, etc…but bottom line…when I look into her eyes, when i hear her voice, even when she tries to annoy me all I see is the future, the future, the future…cutie…cutie…cutie love.

Life of a Consultant

It’s almost 8:30pm on a Saturday evening. Signed in at the office by 7:30am this morning. Spent 30 minutes in the car park wondering how I’ll drag myself upstairs to start work. It had been a really busy week. I had been constantly closing between 8 and 10pm for the past few weeks thanks to a manager that has been flowing ‘monkeys’ at me. The latest being he asking me to come up with a baseline for review of a Bank’s IT infrastructure.

BASELINE! BASELINE! BASELINE!

First he asked for a work programme for the infrastructure review and I took two days to develop that and submitted it at 12 noon on Friday. Then he calls me a few minutes to 5pm and starts giving a lecture on what he expected and like he said…he couldn’t see the technical depth.

-it’s 20 minutes to five pm on a Friday evening

-I am starting a new project on Monday

-I am yet to effect corrections on a proposal you gave me an hour ago

-I am yet to effect the partner’s corrections on the report for the last project I did

-I owe another manager my finalised report for a project I conclude in May which the partner is yet to sign off on

-You are asking me to do a detailed technical s*** in an area I am not very conversant with all these constraint?….

His solution…get someone to work with and hand over to.

Brilliant! Why didn’t I think of that? All your experienced hands are off on one project or the other. The guys in the office just resumed a week ago. The only experience person around….well…

Okay I finally get him on the ‘team’ and after telling him what we had to do he said… ‘let’s come and do it 7-12 tomorrow’. Okay, fine by me. 7am-12noon!

Saturday 1am: finally went to sleep after a 30 min telephone conversation with…umm…sweet, yummy, chocolatey, honey…Cutie love….

Saturday 5am: Wake up! wake up! wake up! House mate back from a party…had to go open the gate

Saturday 7:15am: off to the ofc

Saturday 7:20am: passed by ‘team member’s’ house…car still parked

Saturday 7:30-8:00am: sitting in car sleepy and hungry

Saturday 8:00am: called ummmmm….Cutie love…to complain and she said go grab a bite

Saturday 8: 01am: called ‘team member’ and he asked for an hour or two

…went back home…ate breakfast…went back to work…briefed team member…started the research and …………..team member said, ‘I have a wedding to attend’

 

&^%*&$%£$”£%^%£$%^%”^E%£%^%*(&(“&**%£&$%$”*&^%”**(£

(okay..you just might need a decoder to figure the words out).

 

Well I rummaged the net until 1 went home to get a lil nap was back by 6 pm and continued rummaging the net. Got 43 web pages open and…okay bottom line I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT I AM DOING! But the good thing about this consulting business is that…monday morning…or sometime during the week…mgr would have his shining report with all the facts and figures he needs. God bless www.ctrlCandctrlV.net

The Pony In the Dung Heap

Heard this story yesterday at a seminar. It made a impression and I found out that it was one of President Ronald Reagan’s favourite jokes.

The joke concerns twin boys of five or six. Worried that the boys had developed extreme personalities — one was a total pessimist, the other a total optimist — their parents took them to a psychiatrist. First the psychiatrist treated the pessimist. Trying to brighten his outlook, the psychiatrist took him to a room piled to the ceiling with brand-new toys. But instead of yelping with delight, the little boy burst into tears. “What’s the matter?” the psychiatrist asked, baffled. “Don’t you want to play with any of the toys?” “Yes,” the little boy bawled, “but if I did I’d only break them.” Next the psychiatrist treated the optimist. Trying to dampen his out look, the psychiatrist took him to a room piled to the ceiling with horse manure. But instead of wrinkling his nose in disgust, the optimist emitted just the yelp of delight the psychiatrist had been hoping to hear from his brother, the pessimist. Then he clambered to the top of the pile, dropped to his knees, and began gleefully digging out scoop after scoop with his bare hands. “What do you think you’re doing?” the psychiatrist asked, just as baffled by the optimist as he had been by the pessimist. “With all this manure,” the little boy replied, beaming, “there must be a pony in here somewhere!”

The Spring of Life?

It’s Easter season. A season of new life, new beginning, new hopes and new visions. I sit reconsidering the past few hours days, months and years. Just ask a girl out and got a not so favorable response. I appreciated her frankness and courage to say ‘no’. I tried not to show it but I hurt like crazy. I had considered and reconsidered, for months, letting my budding feelings out. Was trying to move on from a relationship that never started but I had hoped and dreamed would. The person involve was a lady I had known almost my whole life. Was like a life long dream. She is older than I am but I did not care. Really did not give myself much of a chance until I we got to be close over a period of time. Told her about the away I felt after a long while of acting like there was nothing. We had a long talk and concluded that we were much too different. We had this talk a couple of other time and she really wanted me to have a word from God on this. Unfortunately, I did not. Somewhere deep inside I felt she was not the one but just wanted it to be her. Went thru a lot of emotional trauma as I hoped and dreamed. Along came this pretty young girl who is in school with my younger sister. Heard so much about her that I longed to see her and prove my sister wrong. But when we met in October 2006, she was all that and more. She was easy going, friendly and we shared the same view points on a lot of things. Got her number and called her often. While I got to know her, I still hoped that things would work with my first love, but it was like pouring buckets of water down a deep well…was just not working. February 14 was the day I decided to move on. Wanted to call and ask…but got cold feet. Still could not believe that she was not involved with anyone. So I tried probing to find out if there was any special activity or gifts from someone in particular. I concluded that she was really single. Went on just generally being a friend until I heard she’ll be in town for Easter. Then I decided that it would be done at the spring of life period. Well today is Monday, we had a long talk last night, she made me talk for an hour after I had ask (during which I confessed all my covert operations on her). After my hour long talk….response was not favourable-she was not interested inbeing involved with anyone at the moment and she barely knew me. It was a pleasant painful experience cuz at least I got it off my chest. This is my STRIKE THREE. (I had once before ask another person and got a …not too favourable response…) I was attracted to the physical appearance….and the answer was no I was attracted to the personality behind…. and the answer was no Where else shall I look to find the one true love… Guess I’ll hang my boots here, put on my Italian shoe and have new hopes, catch new visions as I resume my romantic involvement with the girl (career) that pays the bills.

Today is the 30^th day of the month of March. I sit back this day for a moment to do a brief reflection. I really do not want to do a deep sober reflection cuz it end up in sorrow and regret for not achieving what I set out to. But I ask myself these simple questions…

Do you have food to eat?

DO you have clothes to wear?

Do you have a roof over your head?

Do you have people who love you and care?

Do you have a sense of security in your country?

Do you have a God you believe in and can trust for the things that are beyond your reach?

If your answers have been yes then you have no reason to be downcast?

Don’t let pictures of the devil prevent you from enjoying life’s little joys.

Go out today…give someone an unexpected smile, hug, kiss and see the persons reaction

This little experiment would go to show

That the things we really desire

Can be gotten for free and without struggle

If only everyone would be willing to give

That which costs nothing at all to release

That He Gave a cake and chocolate

For God so loved the world that He gave…ok I know I have lost half of my audience at this stage. It valentines day a day dedicated to Lovers…well we all know that. Something remarkable happened today…I rekindled an old flame. There is nothing more endearing than a gift especially when it’s a surprise gift. Back when I was in school I used to bake and share around to my close friends. Whoa! You should see their reactions. I retired from baking after a few months after I join my company. What happened…well someone from back in school who knew what I could do with my hands requested I do her birthday cake. I declined cuz of my crazy work schedule. Added to that, I am not at my folks place. Well she insisted and my kind heart gave way. It turned out to be a flop cuz the butter was crap. I was so discouraged that I gave up. Subsequently when I needed to have a cake for my office I’d just contract my mum. My colleagues loved her cakes but I knew that I could do better. Well their expectations called out the passion back. Over the weekend I got my stuff I’d needed…butter flour, egg, sugar…in preparation for Tuesday night. I started mixing the butter and sugar on Monday night. Tuesday I completed the mixture but one of my secret ingredients was missing. I walked for about 30mins at past 10pm to find it. Was too tired to bake when I got back home.

5am I was up! (your passion drives you. I remember back then I school when I wake up by 2am to decorate a cake…those were the days…) I put in the finishing touches (my secret recipe) and it was in the oven by 5:20am. About 30mins later disaster stuck! The gas cylinder was empty. I was devastated inwardly. After all the effort and the dream springing the surprise was about to end. After about 30 minutes an idea finally came to mind…the kerosene stove and a pot (good old hostel days)

Well it is 3 hours later and the numerous commendations I received this morning was worth all the efforts. Though I may not have a girl to take to the Caribbean, or buy a box of chocolate and a bouquet of rose…I have over 20 lovely colleagues who are thrilled over a slice of cake and two tiny chocolate bars (yes I got a lot of that too)…and I have had a HAPPY VALENTINE DAY…

For God so loved the world that He gave…giving the manifestation of Love.

HAPPY VALENTINE DAY

I am one of the many young working class Lagosians who are fortunate to have a family to perch with until they can gather enough to stand on their feet (rent an apartment). I renewed my quest for emancipation recently after a little reflection on my life at the beginning of my new year. I got me a Castle magazine (contains property for sale and lease) to have an idea of what I could be looking at. After a few minutes of diligent review I start doing a quick glance at the price before giving the property a second thought. All through all I could do was sigh sigh and sigh again. How do Lagosians do it? Here I am willing to part with 200K per annum and all I can get for that is a little hole within reasonable distance to the island or a normal flat in the next state. I think I shall unreflect my little reflection and restrategise towards the next reflection date

Today I speak cuz I can

Tomorrow I’m silent cuz I can